A cleaver and silly story

Phil Gilliland, from Northern Ireland, visits his dentist in Southsea, Portsmouth because he feels something is not quite right in his mouth.

Dr Ansari, his dentist examines him and says, 'Phil, that new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?'

Phil answers with a slight frown, 'All I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious - Hollandaise

Sauce, I think it was. I loved it so much I now put it on everything: meat, toast, fish, vegetables, everything.'

'Well,' says Dr Ansari, ' that's probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. It's eaten away your upper plate. I'll make you a new plate, and this time use chrome.'

'Why chrome?' demands Phil.

To which Dr Ansari, the dentist, replies, 'It's simple. Everyone knows that there's no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise.'